When that time in your life comes and you choose to make the transition from child to man by hopping on your
mighty steed and growing a mustache that would scare the warriors of Sparta back to their ravished village.
Yes, at times you will be scared, you will be afraid of the beaming masculinity that will ensue, but I can
tell you from experience men, bask in it, let it take you on a journey unknown and raise your loins in the
name of justice!!
To tame the beast, you must care for it, feed it, and let it know you are the Alpha! In the morning I use
a combo of Shea butter and natural oil made by my goddess which entails coconut, almond oil, infused
calendula flower, beeswax, vitamin E & tea tree oil, aloe gel, coco butter, lavender and vanilla essence.
A mouthful I know, but you don’t half ass wrestling a tiger with your bare hands for nourishment do
you? This treatment stops the serfs in their tracks and police officers to stop in the streets to gaze at your
mustaches wonder!!
To trim, I simply capture a snapping turtle to chomp through the coarse fibers to perfection. If time is
of the essence, I grab a pair of Wahl MAG clippers with my desired guard length. Pointed towards my face, I
brush with the grain gently so not to take out a chunk. I do recommend springing for good
clippers, cheap ones tend to blow out within a few months. Remember, money well spent now will save you
numerous trips to your local Cheapomart. For the sides and top I use a straight razor with shaving cream or
soap.
So go forth gents, grow your facial hair with an aggression only known to wild vultures as they prey on the
special of the day!!
CONTRIBUTOR:
Ezz Hassan – Lead Mustache ExpertEzz is co-owner The Spindle ATL, a cycle-centric clothing and gear store.
By day he grows mustache. Find him on social media @thespindleatl? |